You're dead inside. This revelation doesn't fill you with any sort of emotion; the bits that would normally be upset at the discovery that they've died are already, well, the dead bits. You reflect on how you got here. You were raised in a Christian household, brought up on good,… Read more
The Alphabet of Bad IdeasThere are no good ideas. Something can, and will, always go wrong. Join me in an exploration of the pessimism and self-doubt that can taint even the most harmless, unimportant decisions of our lives.
Ah, yes, the new parents! Let me be among the first to congratulate you on your fertility! I assume you've reviewed the pamphlets? Excellent, excellent. Then you already understand how our program works, and why it is so necessary to society's continued function. Do I see some unanswered questions lingering… Read more
You're walking past the animal shelter, and a shaggy little beast catches your eye through the window. You've been on your own for a few months now, and some company would be welcome. Besides, you rationalize, maybe having something else around to take care of will help you keep your… Read more
You look across the room and see her, and immediately recognize that you're facing a crossroads moment. If you walk over to her and start a conversation, your life will be changed forever. The entire party seems tinged by a sort of prescience, a feeling of fates aligning. Or, perhaps,… Read more
It starts out innocently enough. "I'm bored," you think to yourself. "Maybe writing will give me something to do. It'll be one of those creative outlets my therapist is always pestering me to find." So you set up a blog somewhere. Maybe you sign up for a free Wordpress account.… Read more